Vereniging de Trut

The Bitch Association…
What a name for a place and I would even go as far as saying that this place is just a whole other world in itself! My accounts of going to TBA are a bit blurry at some points, but imagine yourself going on a space shuttle ride and landing on a new planet inhabited by people just like you and me, but in a whole new world of bitches.
It’s 9:45 PM AET (Amsterdam Earth time) Sunday night when I reached a small queue of other earthlings waiting to discover planet TBA. While waiting, I was randomly handed a bottle of sambuca as a friendship offering from the other earthlings. Cheers! The mood is right and we are ready to head on inside once the nearby church bells rang at 10pm AET.
As we walked in, we were first greeted by this planet’s equivalent of a bouncer who asked for a peace offering of 2 Earth Euros (cheap planet!!!). Next, the TBA-​ling asked us to put our human life supporting devices, otherwise known as mobile phones, away as at TBA, these devices are harmful to their planet. Us humans were of course surprised at this request, but it worked out in the end as it forced us to naturally communicate with each other and have fun without twitter-​instragram-​facebook-​pintrest-​grindring the night away.
I scan my surroundings and am reminiscent of being in a 1980’s MTV game show with old TVs hanging from the ceiling, odd neon colors splashed throughout the planet with it’s ultraviolet glowing atmosphere. Suddenly, I found myself catching the eye of a local heavily bearded TBAling who smiled, walked right up to me, and proceeded to make out with me. I noticed that the friendly peaceful TBAling’s beard was as soft as rabbit fur as we were engaging in our interplanetary liplocking. The inhabitants of this planet SURE are friendly, I thought to myself as I thanked him, wiped my mouth and walked over to the bar area to check out the local drinks.
«5 beers please!» I shouted to the TBA barmen who conveniently understood our Earth language.
«That’s 5 Euros», replied the barmen with a cute TBA smile.
«Oh I’m sorry, I wanted FIVE beers please» correcting him since 5 euros doesn’t make sense.
«Yup, 5 Euros!» confirmed the barmen still with a cute TBA smile.
I guess the Earth Euro goes a LONG way here, now realizing this would be a long night filled with 1 Euro beers and 2 Euro vodkas!
I could go on and on describing my experiences at this new planet TBA, but summing up some highlights of my journey, I’ve seen small black dildos flying through the air; some hitting my head and some landing in my cup of vodka, female TBAlings squat peeing right next to me along the urine wall, and at one point I found myself completely surrounded by all girl TBAlings making out with each other on the dance floor.
I can tell you that on Earth, it doesn’t rain dildos and girls usually sit on a toilet, but these environmental and cultural differences are what makes me love Trut so much!
After my exhausting yet amazing journey through the world of The Bitch Association, I descend back to earth, manage to bike home and woke up Monday morning looking like a bitch crack whore who hasn’t slept for 3 days.