B&Q

This store is really big and has lots to choose from.
They have a great outdoors section with indoor and outdoor plants.
There is also a lovely home sections with throws and cushions and pictures.
What I will say about this store is there are lots of staff, but are extremely unhelpful, most don’t seem to have very good customer service and look like they are going out of their way to avoid customers. There is also never really anyone at the tills so it’s mostly self service, which isn’t great if it is large products that have been bought.
Loads to choose from, but only go if you need no help or advice.

Far back in the mists of time when I were a lad, bread were tuppence a loaf and everythin’ were made o’ wood (and how many more clichés can I cram into this opening sentence), you could go down t’ street t’ ‘ardware store and buy a penn’orth o’ nails and still have change for a bag o’ crisps and a bottle o’ pop.
Now, thanks to the giant orange monster that is B&Q (Home Depot to transatlantic chums), I have to get in my car and drive several miles to a humongous warehouse, where I am forced to buy a box of 100 that will, having used 5 or 6 of them, forever after sit on a shelf gathering dust and slowly rusting until either the sun goes nova or I suddenly develop a need for that particular size and type of fastening once again. That’s assuming they have the particular item in stock of course; it wouldn’t be the first time that I’ve had to drive to one of the other B&Q stores to find what I’m after (my record is three).
I’m being a little unfair on them for comic effect here — there’s no denying that B&Q and their main competition Homebase are filling a niche in the market by providing practically all your DIY and hardware needs under one roof; but at the price of forcing smaller ironmongers out of business. If you’re a tradesman with a trade account, or if you’re just embarking on a major domestic refurbishment, this should be your first port of call. But years later, in the back of a kitchen drawer, I guarantee that you’ll come across a little plastic box full of some miscellaneous widgets whose purpose and reason for buying you have long forgotten.

B&Q are the last refuge of the desperate.
Men and women carrying small rubber parts or lengths of pipes that only a couple hours a go were pouring water into their kitchens.
I have been one of these lost souls. Trying to save a Hogmanay party as I drove at breakneck speed to this B&Q with portions of my kitchen sink plumbing my hand. Furiously looking for the right size of «o» ring to match the parts. Until I found out that my kitchen pipes were National Hungarian sizes and B&Q only stocked Euro sized rings. Such is the world of pain and disappointment that the B&& can unleashed on you.
The ads make this place look all happy and full of people bettering themselves. In truth, most B&Q’s are where you find folks literally trying to keep their heads above water.
The staff are the recipients of the most asinine questions. Can I paint my car with this? How long a pipe do I need? Will this be bright enough for my patio? I understand why they have a look of pain whenever approached by a member of the public.
They make these stores big. Vast repositories of tools and materials. When unearthed centuries from now, our descendants will think we worshipped copper piping and hand tools, as we flocked here on weekends to tithe and toil.
Do I really need to tell you what to expect at a B&Q? Enough stuff to really screw up your weekend. That is what you will get.
If you think you can just buy a bathroom suite and one will magically appear in your home. I want to live in your world.
Don’t get me started on the Gardening section. Dismemberment «R» Us.
Why four stars — cause it is a great improvement over the old inronmongers. Where pensioners disguised as store staff would hurl abuse and questions at you simultaneously. While they make fake attempts to find things that they know they do not have, since your broken item was made after 1940 and they only have parts for things made before that.
So just remember, it could be worse.