Dixons

Eternal hi-​5s to the two guys working the closing shift at Dixons on Saturday, July 4^th. I walked in to buy a converter to charge my phone. Then things got weird.
Ridiculously & Suspiciously Helpful Events:
1. When I indicated I needed it for just a few hours before heading back to the States, one of the guys suggested just charging it behind the counter.
2. I returned before they were set to close the store to find the phone wasn’t fully charged. I started to buy a power supply, but my card didn’t work because Merica needs to get on board with a credit card chip + PIN number. Do you know that they went to the back of the store and found an old and battered charging plug for me? Just like that?
3. They offered to find me a Dutch husband so I could stay in Amsterdam and secure free university attendance for my spawn.
4. They did not volunteer to sire my spawn.
After these ridiculously and suspiciously helpful events I was inclined to believe, on America’s birthday, that maybe I needed to live somewhere else (expressly the Netherlands). That is all.