Helium Comedy Club

This was my first and last time here. We went to see Lachlan Patterson, and he deserves 5 stars. But helium comedy club was the most disappointing club we’ve ever experienced. The opening comedian, Anthony, was effing hilarious but we could hardly hear him because of a drunk woman who kept spilling her drinks and being over served. She showed up drunk, and as a bartender I was like, «no way will they serve that obnoxious drunk B»…but they did! A lot! She was so loud that we couldn’t hear the comedians, and when I realized staff was not going to step in, I leaned in to her table and politely asked her to keep it down a bit… she then turned her chair around and just stared at me. Super awkward. I’m nine months pregnant, I knew this would be our last date night out for awhile, and I seriously love Lachlan but I didn’t even get to enjoy myself because the staff were too busy out by the bar to intervene and make it a positive, enjoyable experience for the rest of us there that were clearly irritated. Very unprofessional. It’s not fair to your customers or the comedians. Find better staff!!! I’m sure there are much kinder, more attentive people out there that would love to work here! Besides the experience that nearly made me cry from feeling so effing angry, the food was overpriced and bland. Shame on y’all. Fun killers!!!

First time at helium comedy club and was treated horribly by the box office lady! She had such an attitude and absolutely treated me disrespectfully in front of my kids. The box office is separate from the bar and she immediately gave me attitude and talked down to me because I brought my kids with me. I was unaware I was not allowed to bring kids to the box office, the security guard was nice and let me through, I did call and complain about her and they said bringing kids shouldn’t have been a problem because it was not connected to the bar. Aside from the bad service the first two comedians weren’t so funny, main event was good, also I don’t recommend the nachos they are very bland and have only veggies on them.

Comedy was great, service was ok, but I was charged for incorrect items. I purchased 2 tickets and one food item, but I was charged for two food items. They clearly don’t have a service process down.

I’m giving this place 5 stars cause I’m currently taking a stand up class there. However If at the end of the class I’m not funny. I’ll be reducing it to 2 stars. Balls in your court Helium.

Great venue, not over-​crowded and the food/​drink prices are very reasonable. The comedians were absolutely hilarious and the wait staff are pretty good. My wife and friends had a great time and will be back… parking sucks, so good luck w/​that, but once you get in, it’s pretty damn fun.

Got put in the far back corner and could barely get in the seats behind the table because of it all being so packed tightly together. The way you stand in line to get your ticket and then have to walk to another area to get in line to be seated is real bad. Service was weird, he asked for my credit card but then told another person at my table «I’ll get yours at the end of the evening». They lite our candle on the table twice and we told them it’s out of oil. He didn’t do anything about that though. So we couldn’t read the menu so we didn’t get any food. The other people at our table ordered nachos and I heard them complain because they couldn’t see their food as they ate. The comics were ok but I’ll never go back there.

Very poor seating. Every time. They could sell less tickets and still be as full. Servers distract from the acts. I recognize they’re working hard. They’d probably get better tips if they were able to give better service.

I came here with a friend to see Ian Michael Black, his opener was pretty good. The service and wine was decent.

Yes, I am a fan. I love going to comedy shows. Helium makes the experience good too. We’ve gone to 3 shows now, all headliners I’ve seen before years ago. So I knew I’d like those acts (and I really did!). The 2 opening comedians for all the shows were fantastic too.
You never know who you’ll get or if you’ll like their comedy, but we’ve enjoyed all the folks we’ve seen, particularly Alex Falcone. Saw him twice, about a month apart, and while some material was the same, there was new stuff too. Funny guy. My husband is even considering taking his comedy class there.
We haven’t tried the food except for some fries and some desserts, both of which were surprisingly good. 2 item minimum per person in the club, but you can get food, drink or both. We’ve gotten reserved tickets each time, which means we don’t need to get there super early to get a good spot, although there really is no bad seat in the house. Some servers were great, others seemed like they disliked their jobs.
All in all, a great comedy experience, and we will definitely be back for more laughs.

Not a bad venue, but they definitely have some things they could fix. You’re only able to pick up your tickets, regardless of when you bought them, in a little tiny window of time before the show. Makes it difficult to plan around and guarantees you’ll just be standing in a dumb line forever. There seemed to be some better seats available still, but we were seated waaaay out as far into one corner as possible.
I also won tickets. Yay! But they’re only good for non-​special events. Which means they’re only good for someone you’ve never heard of. I understand the point of it, and I’d like to see some more local comedy, but it seems like it’s not valid for 80% of their shows.
In any case, it was fun, but I don’t know that the venue had much to do with that. I will say, though, that the MC, the local, was funnier than I expected. Started off a little rocky, but once he got going, he was pretty good!

I saw Christopher Titus here, so I can’t attest to the local comedy, but he was funny. The place is easy to find, nice layout, food is average for a club/​bar, drinks are average, over iced and overpriced. I think I saw my waitress twice on an hour and a half. I had already paid for the tickets to see Titus and I had to do the two item minimum as well, which I felt was a little too close to highway robbery for the quality.
It was a fun night, though. If you can get free tickets, then it would be a better deal.

Helium is a little chain of comedy venues in Portland, Philly, and Buffalo. I’d grown to used to walking past the little sign in downtown Philly, that I had no idea what a small business this really is with only 3 locations in the country.
The place still seems a little generic, and most shows are busting at the seams, but the ticket staff and servers are generally fantastic. They may be on happy pills. The space is a bit disorganized and the line for will-​call tickets will often wrap around… and around again, and then all of the way down the stairs. Only once have we walked in and not waited in a really awkward spot for an awkward amount of time. They send a lot of spammy text messages.
The shows we’ve seen here have generally been really good. They get a lot of big name talent, and also a lot of more local amateur stuff. Ironically, the worst show I’ve seen here was probably the most famous comedian. She also tried to smash me with a door. True story. But the rest of them have been mostly less violent.
In Portland style, the food is significantly better than you’d expect to find at a franchise comedy club anywhere. By Portland food standards, though, eh. The drinks, however, exactly meet expectations — sugary and weak. There’s a 2 drink minimum for each show, I think.
Ok then: Giggles and Diabetes!

This place is awesome! We saw a show last night and had an absolute blast.
Get there early, as seats are first come first serve.
Our server was awesome, the food was really good and the show was hilarious. I will definitely come back here

Get a reserved seat or get in line early to get the best seats. The venue is a bit small but overall is just enough to feel connected to the show but large enough to get some fairly big names.
The menu although getting better is ok. Best to stick with something traditional but of probably just depends on the cook on any given night. Had sandwiches on several occasions but the chicken quesadilla always seems to hit the mark, it’s just a little spendy for what you get.
I prefer to stick with the beers on draft instead if rolling the dice with an expensive watered down cocktail.
All in all its eventually the comic that makes the evening and they do attract some good well-​known comedians but don’t forget to check out the not so well know up and coming ones.
Tip: check them out on YouTube if you have not heard of them or are unsure but don’t watch too much as they Might be found that set on your visit.
If give them 5 stars but their food and service can use a little help.

It was date night and I was totally out of new ideas, so I hit up the Internet and up popped three comedy clubs. Only one was open on Tuesday, so to Helium we went!
Tuesday is open mic nite, and it was great. The comics who were just a lot of filthy language with no content were only on 3 minutes, and the comics who were great left you wishing they could have a longer turn.
Didn’t try the food, as the offerings were not such that we’d have dinner there. But we did have a couple of drinks each and got out for about 25 including tip.
It’s a quick performance, so you don’t get bored – with a LOT of stand up acts. The service was good. I have no idea why you needed a wrist band and a ticket – since Tuesday night is free. However, it was a lot of fun.

Came here to see Hari Kondabolu this summer and it was everything I’d always hoped a comedy club experience would be like. The seating was comfortable, and the service was friendly. I ordered chicken strips and a drink and didn’t feel awkward eating them during the show — the space is the perfect strike between medium-​venue and intimate setting. The ability to be seated and not be trampled entering the show was one of the reasons I really hope to come back some day.
I would recommend catching your next favorite comedian in town here.

Overall, we had an AMAZING time. But really only because of the comedians. We saw Jo Koy and a young guy traveling with him, Matt Rife. Best damn show I’ve ever been to fo the acts. The food and service from the servers though was less than stellar.
My husband’s rice bowl was luke warm and tasted like a reheated frozen dinner. My asian salad was dry and bland. I was given one small cup of salad dressing, filled maybe halfway. I asked for another dressing that took almost 20 minutes and 2 reminders and she came back with a less than half full cup again. The third dressing finally came back full but the server looked rather ticked.
Our drinks were never refilled (just regular iced tea) and the brew was way too strong. I had to water it down with half water and half tea. Our water never got refilled either…
Before ordering, I asked what kinds of veggies were in one of the rice bowls and she spouted off a bunch of nonsense that you cpuld tell she made up. never heard of warm cucumbers in a rice bowl. She also said cabbage was in it — which it was not.
I’m certainly glad we immensely enjoyed the show. We’ve seen Joe Rogan and a few others here as well. I would just reccomend making your two items drinks and eating before the show.

I’ve never expected much from Comedy shows in Portland. Aside from big, nationally touring acts that come through now and again, I never felt like there was much worthy of my attention. And although I knew about Helium for quite some time, my past comedy club experiences in PDX had taught me that it was likely just another bunk joint. I guess that’s why I stayed away so long? Now I’m not sure that was such a good idea.
Helium pulls some great talent, and the venue itself is pretty rad. It’s decently large but has a nice, intimate feel. The location is great — right on the inner SE side on Hawthorne. The vibe is fairly laid back, unlike the cattle-​call nature of some of the competition in town. And the reserved VIP seating is a nice touch. I’ll always be down to pay more to not have to worry about where I’m sitting.
I recently saw Jay Mohr here and it was a fantastic show. But that doesn’t necessarily color my experience here. I had a good time because of the good comedy, but also because the venue is in good shape, the service staff are friendly and on point, the layout feels good, the drinks are… well… priced accordingly for a comedy venue, and the food looks decent enough. I didn’t try it. I don’t eat at comedy clubs. I want my mouth free for laughter.
It only took one experience here for me to jump back in, and I have tickets to an upcoming show. Thanks to Helium for bringing a worthy comedy venue to Portland. And booking some seriously good talent.

I figure this place warrants a review after my third time going. To be completely honest, the first couple of times weren’t that great. So when my friend invited me I was extremely hesitant.
I was pleasantly surprised. They say that there is a two drink minimum, but they don’t really monitor or maintain this. The waitresses were very friendly. Of course I was drinking beforehand so I did need to make the occasional trip to the restroom before the show started. Instead of badgering me for my pass each time, the door guy actually made a point to remember me so he wouldn’t have to flag me down each time.
The food sucks, I stopped getting it the last time we went and learned from that mistake. The MC there (I can’t recall her name) is adorable and has great typical PDX jokes.
My only pointer for people is to PRE FUNK before you get there! The drinks aren’t really that cheap considering you can get them at some crappy dive bar likely right around the corner.

This place is a favorite date night destination for JAM and I. If you sign up for their email/​text alerts you can score free tickets 3 or 4 times per year. They tend to get the bigger acts that are rolling through town, and typically shows last 1 ½ to 2 hours. Just be aware that you have to pick up your tickets 45 prior to showtime, which can be tricky if you’re trying to grab dinner beforehand.
The place is a pretty well-​oiled machine, once the doors open you get sat very quickly. They pack people in at times, but it’s not so bad that it is uncomfortable. The staff is generally very prompt with service, although we have had a couple of bad experiences it seems like they’re more on point than not.
We have never had the dinner food, although they revamped the menu recently and seem to be trying to accommodate the «Portland palate» (you know what I’m saying). We have enjoyed the couple of desserts we have tried, but they’re nothing special. The drinks tend to be on the pricey side but the beer and well drinks are well priced.