The Proverbial

When I first moved to Harborne, I always avoided The Proverbial after hearing the annoying pumping music and seeing the crowds falling (literally) out on weekend nights it didn’t seem to be my place.
I always skipped passed it (along with a couple of others) on any ‘Harborne Mile’ pub-​crawl. Favouring instead the hipper venues instead like The Plough, The Junction or The New Inn. I had already decided that the beer in The Proverbial would be awful and the people would be horrible.
As much as I love the aforementioned venues; it’s only natural that I have a good old-​fashioned patriotic moan too. Occasionally I would moan that they’re too full of hipsters, or pretentious snobs or the sorry feeling of one’s money dwindling away when paying upwards of £4 for every pint. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a huge fan of Harborne’s pubs and will happily bore you to death about how great they are. I just sometimes felt that the Harborne mile is missing a Wetherspoons style pub. Little did I know that The Proverbial is Harborne’s answer to ‘spoons. Perhaps I am a pretentious snob too, for skipping past it towards more expensive venues?
The Proverbial is known to many as The Varsity, «from their student days». I studied in That London, so am less aware of the former Birmingham student scene. At the time it was a Mitchells & Butlers pub, who still dominate pub ownership in Birmingham. In November 2010 it was sold along with 332 other Mitchells & Butlers pubs to ‘Stonegate Pub Company’ of That London. It is interesting to note that prior to November 2010 Stonegate didn’t own or run a single pub, they suddenly had 333 overnight! As such, in the immediacy that followed I think all of their pubs fell a little in quality & consistency. There are learning curves for new business owners and these owners suddenly had over 300 businesses to run. Stonegate managed to swathe the test of the difficult first few years and currently own 620 bars across the UK.
Back to the public house in question: I started going to The Proverbial as it’s the venue for Parent Teacher Association (or «Friends») meetings, for my daughter’s school. I have been rather pleasantly, surprisingly, impressed. Whilst I feel the dim lighting and denounced décor leans towards a Friday/​Saturday night crowd; I have found outside of those times it’s a fairly relaxing quiet pub.
They serve Wye Valley HPA, which is always poured clear and in good condition. Like Wetherspoons, it’s the prices that attract one to this venue. The beer is £2.75, which is £1+ less than one can expect to pay at many of the surrounding venues. It’s not a lush, attractive, cool or even perhaps as comfortable as others locally, and I would still avoid it on weekend evenings. I will possibly use it more frequently though, for a quiet midweek pint after work that isn’t going to break the bank.

The Proverbial is one of the newer pubs in Harborne and is popular with a student crowd. A word here about pubs in Harborne — although it’s not a massive high street it does house about 20 pubs in total — if you count The White Swan going out towards town and The Court Oak stretching out towards Quinton. Because of this proliferation Harborne is home to the infamous (and some would say fool-​hardy) ‘Harborne run’ — basically a pub crawl taking in pubs in the village, which generally finishes at The Bell (or perhaps A&E depending on how many pints are consumed). Anyway, along with The Green Man and The Plough this is a definite stop-​off point for students attempting the run and I guess the cheapish pints and loyalty card scheme here also appeal. Karaōke is popular — although unless you have a masochistic streak, perhaps best avoided. They also host a crafting group, have a nice garden out the back and during the day has a quieter feel — when it seems popular with office workers who can be seen tucking into their tuna melts and curly fries as you walk by.

The Proverbial can be seen as Harborne’s version of Wetherspoons, offering similar deals on both food and alcohol.
Situated at the top of the High Street, formerly known as ‘The Varsity’, The Proverbial is open to all citizens of Harborne, making its name as a popular student hang out for those who attend Birmingham based Universities near by.
Most week nights fluctuate in terms of business, with Friday evening, all day Saturday and all day Sunday being the most popular times of the week.
A firm favourite of mine from The Proverbial would be the Lasagne, as well as the Texan Beef Chilli burger, which can both be purchased for the exteremely fair price of £6.50.
Available at the Proverbial are a range of Wines, Beers, Real Ales and Cocktails, making it popular amongst the younger generation.
Overall, I would definitely recommend a visit to The Proverbial if anyone is in the surrounding area, a great English pub/​bar with some competitive prices that would impress anyone.

At first glance this pub looks well refurbished with a variety of seating styles, flocked wallpaper and chandelier lighting. Unfortunately after a couple of minutes reality begins to set in and it feels like you are sitting inside a grubby mess of mismatched Argos furniture, sticky tables and badly printed box canvases.
The pub is quiet for an evening, even a Monday. It’s a large pub and there are only about 15 punters in but tables remain sticky, some covered with dirty plates and cutlery as the staff stand talking at the end of the bar.
The photos on the wall leave a lot to be desired. I sat across from two large canvases featuring yellowed images of jockey caps and jackets hanging in a racecourse dressing room. This does nothing for the place when offset against it’s palette of coffee and sage. Mmmmm…
The coffee served in The Proverbial is your standard Costa fare and the food menu is pretty uninspired with the usual lasagne, scampi and chips, ham and eggs, mixed grill, steak pie… etc. on offer.
Prices do seem reasonable but the grill section is a little more expensive with both the mixed grill and 8oz rump steak priced at £9.99.
There are a fair few veggie options available too but I’d rather spend my money down the road at The Plough.
Free WiFi and beer garden are a plus if you don’t mind sitting in a dirty pub with no atmosphere.

The Proverbial
So I’m sat in the Proverbial with a drink this afternoon enjoying the sun. As i looked out the window to see Harbourne high street winding down after another day of business, I looked into the bar I was sitting out to see dirty tables (food and glasses left unattended while the bar staff stood at the end of the bar talking).
This is not a terrible thing by any means; the bar had less than 20 people in it so there were plenty of seats. I then raised my arm to take a drink and that’s when I realised how sticky the tables where, I don’t have must arm hair as it has and I now have less.
That’s fine, the staff have important things to discuss, I can’t expect them to be cleaning tables. Aesthetically the bar is cookie cutter, that Weatherspoon mix between old and new, wooden tables, your Nan’s carpet choice ect. One thing I like is the low hanging lights around the bars and over the tables, nice big lamp shades, i got a manly soft spot for them.
I looked up to see what the lamp shade above my table had going for it, to my surprise the whole fixture was missing its bottom and was held together by tape, only one bulb out of three was working and a single nail hung so low it was almost below the shade it’s self; as if to say «Your screwed». I think that’s a fitting «proverb» in its self.
As for the menu, standard pub British, curry, pasta and big grills. The standard you know and expect from a bar that also has a Costa coffee hidden in the back. 9.99 for a mix grill, I didn’t order any food though in fear of finding the rest of the overhead light in my side salad.
They seem to have a lot of offers dotted around, they serve fish bowls and cocktails; that might make the place ok. They also do party bookings, offer free wifi and a stone face service. It closes at 11pm in the week and 1am on the weekends.