Jonell’s Cocktail Lounge

Forget about all the trendy and overpriced bars popping up in the TL. Jonell’s is the real deal!
Nothing beats the feisty older Korean woman at the bar. She’s a true SF legend. Cheap drinks are also a good reason to come here.
Expect to see some absolutely insane people… this is the Tenderloin after all. But if you ask me, that’s just part of what adds to Jonells’ charm. You can’t live in San Francisco and not check it out at least once.

My husband and I were looking for a dive bar experience in San Francisco. Wow. We sure picked the right place when we stumbled into here. The service by Bonnie was incredible. She made us feel at home. She poured wonderful drinks. Her conversation was amazing. She was very knowledgeable about the city. She was also hilarious when she kicked a customer out it was being rude. I highly recommend that you try this place!

One of my favorite dive bars in the city. A lot of character and characters here.

Nevermind I have no idea

If you’re in this hood and you’re in this bar then you know what you’re doing. You’re here to drink. You’re here for cheap drinks, not the atmosphere or the conversation. Though I did have a very interesting conversation with the bartender. Very nice lady.

The bartenders are fun (especially Bunny), drinks are cheap and it’s a Horseshoe!

Everything you want in a dive bar including that «hold your purse closer to you» initial feeling… but then step inside and it’s wonderful. Like Ryan Adams says: a bar is a beautiful place. Divey. Dark. Familiar. Great jukebox… c’mon: they have Conway Twitty and an awesome juke. Whoo hoo! Ask the bartender if she wants to arm wrestle…

I love and miss this place, Joann (mama) is the best, I used to come to this place after working at Buca Di Beppo and get shit faced and laugh cuz Joanne is funny as hell. She was so friendly, the jukebox is cheap with alot of oldies yayeee!!! If I ever move back to the TL I will be here.

Jonell’s is a true dive right in the heart of the Tenderloin.
With that said, expect the worst and enjoy the show. We went in and had a seat at the bar. Within the span of an hour we saw a lot. People coming in and trying to sell things like beef jerky, jeans and women’s beauty products. And then you have random people coming in and trying to get patrons to buy them drinks or just yelling.
The bartenders are the best. Two older Korean women kicking people out and telling them they will kick their ass.
Super seedy.

The corner of Jones and Ellis is not where dreams are made, they just aren’t. (unless poverty and narcotics are your dream). Jonell’s is a dive and it’s probably always going to be a dive (check back in tow years when gentrification has proved me wrong) Do I like this bar? I can’t tell. Every drink I had was like an affirmation that I was in a place I shouldn’t have been.
By the time I finished my time here I came to respect the tow women who ran this place, cautious, friendly but firm. They got a lot of crazy patrons. Dives have a way of attracting the damaged and broken folk which is why they shouldn’t be made light of or used as a tourist destination. These people are here to drink and don’t need your crud.. . or my crud for that matter.

This is your typical Tenderloin rathole consisting of crackheads, druggies, and washed up drunks. The asian femae bartender, sensing we were out of our element, was very friendly and was telling us about some of the events surrounding the bar, such as shootings and stabbings,

Woah. Seedy patrons, creepy location, a female Chinese bartender who has the filthiest mouth I’ve ever heard, and cheap drinks. Free unsalted peanuts too.
Come for the entertainment, and stick around as long as you can before common sense kicks in.

«DUDE THIS BAR HAS A NUDE ‘FIND THE DIFFERENCE’ GAME!»…was the statement of the night that kept my 4 other friends and I at this little, quaint dive bar.
We all went in thinking it would be a pit stop to get drunked up before we headed to Polk to really throw our livers against the wall. We walked in and were greeted by 2 Asian women behind the bar; their faces lit up as if being refueled, ready for a nights worth of serving idiots choosing to drink on a stormy Tuesday night. Could have been because my friends and I are of Asian decent, or could have been they wanted our money, nonetheless they were extremely hospitable and attentive to us, sometimes disregarding the fact that there were 2 other people at their bar, THEY EVEN PUT SOME MONEY TO LET US PLAY THE NUDI FIND IT GAME. We loved it though, we bought shots, played the nudi find it game, and the bar tenders were really talking to us and trying to enjoy themselves as well– oh when they poured drinks, THEY POURED THOSE DAMN DRINKS… that business was HELLA STRONG.
I would have given this place 4 stars, but the one thing from keeping me was the fact that the bar was almost haven to half the bums in SF. Aside from talking to the bartenders, my friends and I had a good exchange of words with various hobos, most of which were unwelcomed and occupied with ideas of how to escape the conversation. I guess some people have shit to say to bums, but I am not going to front and act like I can understand a hobo barking about green carriages being lead by leprechauns on Vaness.
GOOD BARTENDERS, STRONG DRINKS, FUN NUDI FIND IT GAME, — — -hobos.
yea this place get s 3 stars

My coworker asked me if I liked dives. I told him I loved dives, but I had no idea of the caliber of dives he had in mind. This, oh yes, this is a dive! With what? Three beers on tap? LOL… I don’t know, it looked liked the smallest collection of alcohol I’ve ever seen. I’ve only been there once though, right after work. I can see this is the type of place that grows on you… the type of place you learn to appreciate with frequency… the type of place you learn to love as you get to know the regulars. I’ve only been there once, so I’m not giving it much of a chance. I don’t know if that first experience will bring me back though. My coworker said a friend of his loved, loved, loved this place. The Asian lady behind the bar was cool. I guess I gotta give them a chance.

So, I see Jen L stole my story. Since I remember what happened let me set the record straight.
We were walking back through the TL after a short break from our bar crawl. Jen was walking with a burger king milkshake and started singing a song about how it was «bringing all the boys to the yard.» Distracted by her own singing she tripped on the sidewalk and fell flat on her face miraculously not spilling a drop of that shake.
That’s about when I noticed a 50-​something woman straddling the door of Jonell’s, one foot in the bar one foot out. Her outside hand had a cigarette the inside hand had a drink. she leaned out toward us and yelled «Jonell’s is a horseshoe!!!», gesturing with her cigarette while she said it. I assume she was talking about the shape of the bar but have no idea why she was telling us.
A few weeks later I had the pleasure of going back for a drink. If I remember right it’s a pretty rowdy bar but they don’t have a very good beer selection.

I gladly agreed to go here after my trip to Amsterdam Café, and I’m glad I did. Normally I try to stay away from seedy bars, especially in the Tenderloin, but my friend Tom was so convincing in his belief that this would be AMAZING that I agreed to go. Apparently the last time we walked by it during another drunken late night, someone yelled at us «Jonell’s is a HORSESHOE!», but, of course, I was tipsy so I don’t remember. Jonell’s bar IS horseshoe shaped, but why that was so important to someone hanging around outside is beyond me. Maybe they’d never seen a horseshoe bar?
I forget what my friends ordered, but I ordered an O’Douls because I was driving their drunk asses around town and had to keep some semblance of sobriety and I was keeping my eye on my friend who was wasted and getting felt up by one of Tom’s friends. The O’Douls came in an already opened bottle and, as Tom said «lost its label back in the 80’s». Is that normal? I thought it was a bit weird to get a refilled beer bottle, but I’m from the suburbs, so what do I know?
I’m afraid to say I didn’t see the sign on the bathroom threatening to break in if you are in longer than a few minutes, but I did intently study the Chinese Zodiac calendar near the bathroom door and found I would be a perfect match for a Dragon or Snake (I’m a Rooster).
You learn something new everyday, no?
During the night, my friend went outside to cough up a lung because, as he states he «has consumption» (no he doesn’t. He’s a ninny) and was promptly harassed by trannies with really bad painted on eyebrows. I tell you, Tenderloin trannies are the best because they try so hard to look good and they have attitude. How can you not love that? And how can you not love a bar that welcomes them in, along with the coughing ninny, the two drunken people making out, and the girl from the suburbs? Jonell’s is a HORSESHOE!

Seems like all the cool dives in the ‘Loin bars are being found closer and closer to market.
I liked the horseshoe shaped counter and the motley gang of fools sitting there (myself included), the tenders were amiable and attentative.
I will be back to inquire on the ‘bun diggi’???

Lady Pestlebottom and I heartily enjoyed this neighborhood tavern, due in large part to its two delightful bar maidens, Bonnie and Jenny. Immediately upon entry, Jenny greeted us with «Hiiiiiiiiii! Goodlooking people!» The saloon was nearly deserted on this Saturday evening before Memorial Day. Several questionable patrons were in and out, although the one who stayed the longest with us was quite pleasant. A street person wandered in and repeatedly demanded fourty-​five cents from me, which threw Jenny into an amusing, profanity-​laden rage.
We lingered here the longest out of all the evening’s destinations, for the entertaining conversation of our barkeeps. Bonnie fed us mysterious food from her hand, which we were obliged by politeness to take (although I’m quite sure it contained pork, which had not touched my lips in nearly two decades). She also read Lady Pestlebottom’s palm, and insisted that she would have two children in her lifetime. We assumed she must mean children of the canine species, but she was quite adamant that two children would actually emerge from Lady Pestlebottom’s womb. We tried to convince her of the unlikelihood of this scenario, but she would not be swayed.
We were reluctantly about to take our leave when we heard delighted cries of «Cheater! Cheater!» The television program «Cheaters» had come upon the screen, and the bar maidens raised the volume so we could all enjoy. This was followed by the Jerry Springer program, which provided much lively discussion.
The atmosphere of the tavern is appropriately slimy, replete with wood paneling, glass bricks, and hand-​drawn horse portraits of yore. The restroom was squalid and wet. I dared not touch the juke-​box for fear of angering the regulars, who I’m quite certain would not share my musical tastes. The selection of beers leaves much to be desired (they do not serve Pabst Blue Ribbon, unlike most «dive-​bars» in the area), but if I must swill Miller Genuine Draft to be with Bonnie and Jenny, then swill I shall.

the korean ladies, jennie (owner). bonnie and the occassional chinese bartender can actually speak english here. they have nice drink selection, hard liquor and some dark beers also. there’s draught here .
the jukebox is usually going and few patrons are around. i’ve seen these people (barstaff) around. inevitably, it’s «honey, can you buy me a drink, it’s so slooow».
ok.
it;s not a good idea to get inebriated and park far away. some locals like to rob the «tourists».
i come here to relax because i’m familiar with the staff and the nice dark beer selection. ymmv

All bars in the Loin this is tenderest.
Walk in under a big mirrored-​ceiling U-​bar, glass bricks, stacks of supplies and garbage cans against the wall, xmaslights, masking tape braced stools, adds up to bar love. Beautiful middle aged asian bartenders hugging customers like parents. Everything is perfect, if they ever make a national register of historic passouts, Jonell’s is the charter.
There’s serious magic on. First, it’s real. But that’s just front door. They sit on photon cosmic dark anomoly. However bright out, doors open sunbeam, serengetti gamma ray beams of reality, a calm void blankets their most cave beyond any explanation of cold photon physics. It’s a black hole of perception. All with many moneke nekkos (sushi bar arm cats).
Patrons and owners turn to face an always-​open corner door (good idea in case of violence, insanity, robbers) and it’s TV soap commentary of street antics. Can you believe he just clocked her on the head? She just threw up on it? He just picked it up and tried to sell it, now she wants a piece? Hour after hour, endless commentary. All the most striking urban set in the city, Coppola endowed this block with million Hollywood urchins and forgot where he dropped them. Up one direction Nob Hill, richness darting nervously downslope to the ghetto. To the right squatting apartments, then Glide Church huddles against huge tourist tower block hotels. If this is a film something deep is about to happen, if a slot machine the jackpot shoots us to Vegas heaven.
Highly recommended for: (i) authors and songwriters with empty hearts to fill; and (ii) down and out, too far down to get out, would rather just be out a spell and get out of down thisafternoon.
Not recommended for peeps in search of cheap drink. They don’t do happy hour, no specials, no signature drinks, no tee shirts, if there’s a video bar machin it’s old they use a shot glass you can get drunk cheaper elsewhere. You’re all secial, hear, no clock to watch and it’s timeless inside.