Patinette

Don’t come here expecting to get a full lunch before or after a MOCA visit — you’ll have to venture further afield for that. But it does the trick for what it is, a coffee bar with snacks. The espresso and coffee drinks are excellent and the warmed chocolate muffin is to-​die-​for. One big downside is the seating area, which is sunk below the street and is perenially dark. Don’t judge Joaquim Splichal solely on this place — he has much bigger fish to fry.
Go for a quick bite while at the museum, nothing more.

Not every museum café can be like Café 2 at MOMA in NYC but Patinette needs to get it together. I was so unimpressed that I didn’t even order a tea. They DO have a pretty nice selections of wine. The muffins look like they had been there for about two years.

Please don’t be fooled (like I was) into thinking that Patinette Café is anything more than a glorified snack bar.
Suspiciously positive reviews and their own website gave the impression that Patinette Café would be something special. Their website boasts that Patinette Café «turns simple dining into an art form», and describes the food as «gourmet».
The reality is, Patinette Café is very similar to the quick lunch snack bar you’d find in the lobby of office buildings just about anywhere. The tiny space is located under the stairs that lead to the main entrance of MOCA. It’s basically a glass display case with a few selections of pastas and some pre-​made sandwiches. The countertop is cluttered with wicker baskets of cookies, potato chips, and candy bars. The only «ambience» was a radio with news program or talk show in a language I couldn’t identify (it sounded middle-​eastern).
Despite my disappointment upon seeing the place, I was running late, so I decided to order one of the sandwiches and a Snapple ($ 13). The sandwich was pulled directly from the dispay case and handed to me on a plastic, disposable plate. It was bland, with very little content between the slices of bread.
Later, I noticed that there’s a Koo Koo Roo across the street from MOCA. I wish I would have noticed that sooner! Dining at Koo Koo Roo would have been much more upscale (yet cheaper) than Patinette Café.

Because of jury dootie, I had the opportunity to spend lunch at the Patinette Café of MOCA. The sandwiches and salad looked good under those fluorescent lights, and the dude was super nice, but I have to say, for the price, their food isn’t worth it. I had a portobello mushroom sandwich with chevre and spinach. It could’ve rocked my world, but it didn’t. Alongside my half of a sandwich was a fresh spinach salad that didn’t have enough dressing but did have hearts of palm which ding ding! earned it a couple points.
Some young girls went in, trying to get themselves lunch but it was too expensive so they had to go to McDonald’s. Booo.

We’re at MOCA’s Night Vision event and after going into moderate credit card debt for the watermelon (soju) martini ($ 8 plus tip), we headed downstairs to Patinette for a quick nosh.
My ham and cheese sandwich was fine though probably not worth its price. I did enjoy the fact you could order alcohol and that artichoke salad is a vinegar lover’s dream. It had a lot of marinated artichoke hearts, sliced up cornichons, fat cocktail onions and roasted red bell pepper. Okay, so it’s my dream cold salad. A half sandwich, bitchin’ good artichoke salad and beer was $ 15.
What I appreciated about the place was it was very quick despite the line snaking out the door and there was someone who hurried over to take our trays when we were done. I would have hated the idea of having to leave the tray on the table for the next patron to deal with and was glad to dispose of it quickly.

Joachim Splichal’s little deli outside of the MOCA was a great place to pick up a quick bite to eat before heading into see the exhibit at the MOCA.
The sandwiches are great and the service was perfect. The high point was picking up a bag of Joachim’s amazing Mandion Cookies!