Town of Clarence

I’m not someone who has spent alot of time in Clarence until recently. I just don’t get out that far often. But recently I have been here a few times for different reasons. One is to pick up Wagyu beef at the local farm. The other is to see a friend who lives out here.
So I’ve spent a little time in town walking around. It’s cute. Very. Nice little coffee shop and a few stores. Surrounded by farmland and working farms. Some horse barns too.
Very close to the city, but still has flavor of the country. Looking forward to spending more time here.

Welcome to Clearance, NY. Everything in this town is on Clearance, which is why the town is named Clearance, NY. Even brand new stuff that only just came out, is on Clearance.
OK actually that’s probably the opposite of the truth.
I live in Clarence, so it’s my favourite. Technically I live in Newstead out by Akron, way out in the middle of Bumf**kbooeysticksville, NY, but I consider myself a Clarence native because when I want to go for a walk, it’s the «Clarence Bike Path» and when I want a roll, it’s the «Clarence Deli», and when I want to stop at the bank, it’s the «Clarence location.»
Canadian cartoon characters Terrance and Philip used to live here, so briefly the town was named after one of them (Terrance, NY).
Clarence is one of the loveliest places you could live. Some of the more suburban parts are less desirable, but a lot of it really looks like countryside, which is wonderful. Living in the countryside is magnificent. It’s a little expensive to live around here, but then again there are some great deals like a 5-​bedroom house for rent at $ 800/​month. Can you imagine renting an apartment in NYC or LA or San Francisco? And don’t get me started on England.
Most of NY caters to school kids, which is why a lot of kids are spoiled these days. But not in this town. It’s even named after their parents. «Parents, NY.»
If you want good food around here, you probably have to drive to Transit, but there are some good options there, such as Spilios for Greek, Ruzzine’s for burgers, Kabab & Curry for Indian, and one of Buffalo’s best diners, Buffalo Joe’s, is close to it on Main.
The town is actually named after me, specifically what I seem to be doing all day lately. «Errands, NY.»
The food options aren’t as good as in some of the other suburbs, but that doesn’t bother me at all. I can drive to wherever is needed for food… I wouldn’t live anywhere other than Clarence in this area after living here. I couldn’t go back to Amherst or any of those other burbs because living out in the countryside is like paradise, or in this case, «Claredise.»
By the way, watch out for the evil insects here. They will literally kill you. Hence the town name, «Killerants, NY.»
I prefer taller ants though. They are more peaceful. They have a live-​and-​let-​live attitude. Which is why they are called Tolerance.
She calls out to the man in the SUV
Sir, can you Unilocal me?
It’s cold and I must make ends meet
I stay in that motel, see? (points)
He hires her, and she makes his day
Takes his Catholics in her Protestants
He only has a Credit Card to pay
So instead he gives her his spare anti-​depressants
And anti-​anxiety pills
And allergy meds
And painkillers
And the one for the guys who pee in a weak stream
And a few cialis
Oh
Think Twice
It’s just another day for you and me in Claredise
Oh
Think Twice
It’s just another day for you, you and me in Claredise
Then he goes to CVS/​Rite Aid/​Walgreens to stock up on all the meds he gave away.
Just another day in Claredise.