Lawrel Liquors & Tap

This is a ghetto trash bar. A Northside canaryville bar. Yet canaryville bars way better. Thank goodness they closed it down.

There is no comparison! I wish I could sit here all day instead of just when I’m waiting on a pizza from the most excellent Sano’s. Never been disappointed.

Heavenly father this place is intimidating. I didn’t know what to make of it at first. My homey told me there is a free pool table inside. Oh cool, I walked up, there is a pool table right away when you walk in, neat. I moved the frayed starter jacket and well worn orange ski hat to an empty bar stool. Salt and pepper goatee guy comes to life, «Hey you playing in the pool league tonight?»
I jumped, whoa, I thought that guy was a piece of furniture. «Uhh no, just here to shoot, is there a league tonight?»
«I don’t know,»
Oooohhhkaaaaay…So I see my homeys walking around the large bar into the back, I quickly shuffle after them, there is a whole other room! What? With another room behind that one! What? That room was darkened and the door was semi closed, so we stuck with the first room. The pool table was like a 8 footer, so I wasn’t that psyched, plus it looked like it was used as a dining table on more than one occasion, Oh well. I warmed up a bit, shot a few games, then all of a few people trickle in to the back room, then a few more, then a few more, before I know it there are about 8 people we don’t know.
I am simultaneously playing darts and pool, cuz they got it like that, and I feel I may be holding up the show, so I inquire to the other patrons, do you all want to play? No, they all say in unison, and continue to partake in something I thought was banned in bars a long time ago. I am getting some good shots in, playing pretty well, when a new authority guy emerges, «Hey are you guys here for the league?» No, were just shooting around. «Well this is not open to the public back here, when the owner comes in he may kick you out, but if you are buying beers I guess that’s OK.» Weird. A few off color jokes about Aaron Rodgers and some more balls in the side pocket and we decide its time to boogie.
Overall, the experience was bizarre, ranging from people trading playing cards, or something they were trading with our backs to us. To the friendly guy coming in saying its great to see people using this pool room. I still do not know how to rank my experience, it was somewhere between a sketchy dive bar and being in the reptile house at the zoo, as all the patrons reminded me of lizards, slinking about and staying motionless and unblinking for longer than I thought humans were able. I would definitley never go here alone, or without the intention of playing pool, but since I did neither of these things, this ranks as one of my favorite places to play pool in the city.

Scary is right. The room itself is very glum and if I didn’t know any better I’d think it was a meth house. The bartender was not very attentive. When my friend and I were ready to leave, I had to get my card back (bought one drink, don’t know why she automatically decided that I wanted to open a tab…) the bartender was all over one of the patrons, hugging him and touching him inappropriately. I was disgusted. And then while we were watching the tv, she decided to mute it and put on music super loud so that her regulars could sing along to it. One of them even started smoking in the bar. It just seems like the bartender doesn’t care. Wouldn’t come back even for the advertised «apple pie shots.» Gross and creepy.

Lawrel Liquors & Tap is a world class neighbourhood bar.
The beer selection focuses on quality over quantity ($ 1.75 Old Style pints for the win) and the shots available are magically delicious. More importantly, the three available stools in the establishment are by far the most comfortable stools in North America.
For fun times, I go to Lawrel’s. You should too.

I love me some dive bars, but Lawrel goes way beyond dive. Scary patrons who seem to be stuck in 1985 eternally, judging by the music styles and hair choices. Every now and again you’ll get the privilege (as I have) of seeing someone shoot up. Prices are OK but they are fine just about anywhere in Jefferson Park. There are plenty of better options in the area; do yourself a favor and pick one of those.