2007

To update…2007 was a really craptastic year, but 2008 is turning out to be even worse. I think I can say that with certainty by this time of the year.

Perhaps I shouldn’t be reviewing. The ones that have caught my attention (and generally my funny bone) are written by people who thought the year blew huge chunks with legs. So what do I have to contribute that’s Unilocal-​worthy? (Like how 2007 treated me means a rat’s ass to anyone else. «Hey, Randall said 2007 was great! Let’s go check it out!»)
Well, damn it… here it goes anyway.
THE GOOD
–My first full year in Austin. Well, sort of. I moved here in December ’05, but split the first half of 2006 commuting back to Indianapolis.
–Colts win Super Bowl. Eff you, Patriots!
— Got to write music/​create audio for some really, really cool video games.
–Started playing live music gigs again. And in Austin. Way past time for that one.
–Drove the Pacific Coast Highway from L.A. to San Jose, which is something I always have wanted to do. And it was worth every mile.
–Found out that Rockport, TX is actually a really, really cool place to vacation, and somewhat devoid of rednecks. That’s an accomplishment in this state.
THE BAD
–One of my best friends died after a 2-​year battle with cancer.
–A long-​time friend in Cincinnati is at the end stages of his battle with cystic fibrosis. I feel a bit like I’m in Agatha Christie’s «Ten Little Indians» wondering who’s going to be next, and whether it might be me.
–Both dogs had medical issues. Lance (the older dog) tore his ACL. That was a cool $ 2K to repair. Lillie (the youngest) had an abcessed anal gland that had to be removed. Let’s just say that the post-​surgery treatment is… interesting. We dubbed the treatment «squirtybutt.» Lillie isn’t real bright, and only knows about 9 words. «Squirtybutt» is one… and it sends her running for the other room with her tail tucked between her legs.
2007 — you made me realize how lucky I am… a long-​haired musician type who makes a pretty nice living doing what he loves with a woman he adores in a city he worships. Things could be a whole lot worse.

2007 generally sucked for me, but it could’ve been much worse:
Didn’t find a house for the parents in Houston, but now we get to look forward to foreclosures in 2008.
Gave up hope of ever finding an affordable house in Austin. Became content with the benefits of living in apartments.
Converted fully to sadism.
Didn’t get to travel far for my vacation and gained weight during this vacation that I’ve been having trouble losing. Thankful for a vacation – even if it was just to my parents’ house in Houston.
Became a disillusioned hermit.
Inflation not only eroded my savings, but made me feel poorer year-​over-​year.
Became completely cynical about humans.
Good Things:
Mad significant progress in fully converting to fish vegetarianism mostly with the help of the eye-​opening book «Fast Food Nation» and online video «Earthlings.»
Didn’t get sick at all, not even a cold.
Didn’t visit the dentist at all, unfortunately not even for the free teeth cleanings that dental insurance pays for.
Finalized priorities in life.

January:
Working two jobs I really liked, living on the East Side, messing around a lot with a fabulously gorgeous tattooed drummer/​bar guy. Still kinda poor, still scared about my living situation (threatened by guys with face tattoos one day), still coping with the messes of ’06.
February:
Moved across the highway to a much better place. Started dating a physicist with a lot of strange hang-​ups and discovered some hang-​ups of my own. Dad visited and brought a couch, bed and TV, two of which have made it to the new year. The bed has improved my physical health in ways I couldn’t imagine.
March:
Had a great month with the physicist, met Unilocalers for the first time, ended with a great birthday, mom and sister visited. Lost nonprofit job (not technically «fired»). Got the title of my car in my name!
April:
Broke it off tearfully with physicist. Brother visited — a blast!
May:
Enjoyed myself. More of the same. Was sick for a little while. Got hired full-​time to my current job!
June:
Good friend from childhood moved back to town. Got to know previous tenant of my apartment (crazy guy, but awesome). Lots of Unilocal fun.
July:
Weird guy drama. But otherwise, I was starting to get into the groove of the new job. Met a good friend.
August:
Went to Lake Travis for the first time ever and swam a lot otherwise. Other summer fun. Drama continued.
September:
Met San Antonio guy. Prepared to seek alternate employment. Decided elsewhere was not for me and realized I was happy here.
October:
Enjoyed time getting to know San Antonio and San Antonio guy. Worked a lot. Moved into my new, cool house.
November:
Ended things with San Antonio guy. Reunited with best friend of 12 years! Visited home for the first time in a year. Had nice Thanksgiving with friends. Got raise at work!
December:
Settled into new house. Had a strange stalker situation. Had a beautiful Christmas! The jury’s still out on this month.
In summary: Not much bad that wasn’t related to my incompetence with men. Lots of good! What a great year it was!

Ah, 2007. I have a lot to thank you for.
Thanks for being the year that my husband graduated with his master’s degree, after 4−½ years of being a full-​time student. Even better, he found a job that he loves, with a real live salary and his own benefits, all things which make me very happy.
2007 was the year that my brother, who is so picky that he owns maybe three shirts (because no other shirts are good enough) actually made a commitment to the fabulous woman he’s been dating for five years. They are getting married in 2008.
2007 was also the year that I bought my first new car EVER. At the risk of sounding hideously materialistic, I confess that I have never loved an inanimate object so much (with the exception of each and every one of the many, many, many stuffed animals I had as a little girl).
I learned so much about myself this year. I grew both personally and professionally. I fell in love with the amazing Austin Unilocal community and deepened my friendships with many people I adore, notably Unilocaler Liz C. I enjoyed many fantastic meals, shared many great laughs, felt the joy of *true* connections with other human beings, sometimes all simultaneously. Even the challenges that I faced this year, including the loss of our beloved 16-​year-​old dog, taught me a lot and forced me to rise out of the sense of complacency that I had settled into over the past few years. So 2007, while you weren’t without your dark moments and tears, I choose to remember how you helped me grow and learn about myself as a person and about how I want to forge my path through this delightfully confusing thing we call life.
Thank you for that.

I think «eventful» best describes my year. I left the nest of my old, stable, and totally stuck job for an exciting new position that turned out to be much worse. After six months of increasing hell, I quit, two days after my dog (my best friend for ten years) died. Depression and soul-​searching ensued, and as my thesis was developing into something hot, my job hunt was going nowhere. So I applied to law school. Why not?
Then the stars seemed to align and I began to find consulting work, got published, started getting accepted into law schools, got a cool dog, got married, and got my masters. Lets just say that the year ended with a bang. The down times were pretty freaking down, but the stuff I learned from them helped me grow past some of my limited ideas about who I am and what I can do.

wow 2007 has been a shitty year for some of guys on here. The stories have almost made me tear.
Sorry I have to be a killjoy and give this year 5 stars.
Best thing ever this year: the greatest man I have ever met asked me to be his wife after 4 fabulous years of utter happiness. My mom is still cancer free! I turned 30 and look 25. Last but not least I got promoted to a position I am actually proud of.
Thank you 2007.

I would like to say that 2007 has been the worse year of my life, but due to memory loss of previous years, I can’t.
The year started off on a sour note when my best friend’s and my ex-gf’s father died from a brain aneurysm. (note: I dated my best friend’s sister. Yes, a stupid move. I know.) This guy was my scout master when I was a little kid and I practically lived at his house growing up.
Two months later my 15-​year-​old cousin was killed by a gunshot wound to the chest. I will say no more because the case is pending.
Later in the year, previously mentioned ex-​gf, the only person who I could actually refer to as a «real» girlfriend, all others were flings, chicks I was kinda dating, one-​night stands, girls who found me interesting for a month, pity dates, drunken mishaps, psychos I couldn’t get rid of, fantasies, creepy Myspacers, stalkers, or girls who fell on top of me, got married.
During the ‘Great Austin Freeze of 2007,’ one of the only times I’ll probably ever get a day off work for icy roads, I woke up with a crick in my neck that left me paralyzed for about three days.
For the first year, since I started playing baseball, I have a negative batting average.
On the bright side of things, I bought a house and I started taking yoga. Plus, this is my first complete year in Austin.

2007 was the year of the pig. I don’t know what that means in China, but in America, it was a gluttonous year for gas prices and groceries and other pleasures of the wealthy like housing payments and nurse sharks, and the porcine did root about in the muck of their swinish Gods, Lindsey and Paris and Britney Spears.
2007, don’t taze me, bro.

I might be a little generous with these stars, 2007, but I am trying to be objective and just took a giant step back, thanks to my fellow Unilocalalians.
I was going to smack you around a bit, seeing as we had some crummy business/​real estate stuff jack us up in the last few months. But thats not really fair, is it? Because, after all, you shook me up, took me out of my comfort zone, made me feel alive. If you aren’t scared sometimes, you aren’t living. Right?
This year:
Studied for the Texas Bar and passed it, 18 years after I took and passed the California Bar and a good 8 years since I actually formally practiced law. Yay me! (Although I still haven’t taken off the ten pound study weight I put on.)
Couldn’t find a job, although I really didn’t look that hard, because I really really was tired of working for «the man.» After lots of frustration, I decided to rent a tiny office nearby and hang out my own shingle. SCARY SHIT! But, I did it. I also found a nice lawyer in my building who is guiding me a bit and giving me some work — enough so that I can pay my office rent, at least. Hopefully next year, I can make some profit and stop delving into savings. For the first time, both me and my husband are self employed and that is really really scary and wonderful all at the same time. We do have savings that are carrying us right now, but hopefully, next year, we can stop doing that and make it on our own. Scary shit, truly.
I really love my husband. We’ve been together 15 years. He is awesome. Although he acts crotchety at Unilocal events, he is an incredibly nice guy who just acts grumpy in public with strangers.
Obviously, I love my animals. We got saddled with a new mutt when neighbors moved and didn’t’ take their dog. I really did NOT want a new dog, and my dogs didn’t want a new dog, but no one else wanted him so we are trying to make him feel like family. Poor old hound dog is crippled, never slept inside before, never wore a collar, never ate good food. My poor Foozie. I have promised him that the rest of his life will be filled with love.
I am grateful for the health of my family. We will continue to go to the gym as much as possible and try to eat right and drink less.
I am very happy I started Unilocaling. Its fun and I’ve had a blast meeting new people and getting insight on all the cool and delicious things in town.
Well, 2007, you gave me some things to think about and,
hopefully, prepared me for an amazing 2008.
I wish you all a Unilocalaliciously wonderful New Year!

Jaye J’s list made me very thankful for my health.
I am borderline Diabetic so I have to eat and live healthy in order to be happy and healthy so I am thankful my body rules my healthy habits.
Minus 1 star — because my Best Friend and Lover left me after 7+ years together and broke my heart…
Plus1 star — being single and meeting new friends is fun!
Plus 1 star — my Ex still Loves me and gave me the most perfect gift ever — a Merry Christmas/​Happy Birthday card from my dogs!
Minus 1 star — our 15 year old joint custody dog won’t be around much longer.
Edit
Minus another star — because our 15 year old passed away in his sleep last night and I will be very sad for the rest of 2007.

Yes, if everyone else jumped off a bridge, so would I. (Actually, I did jump off a mile marker in a river once. Quite possibly one of the scariest, stupidest things I’ve ever done, but I digress…)
The Good:
1) a whole year without a hospital
2) a whole year of clean scans
3) a whole lot of growin’ up
4) a brilliant first project as project lead
5) an AMAZING opportunity on a new project that is kind of what I’ve been working for my whole life to get
6) the news of my impending nephew who might possibly be the most spoiled child in the world, once he enters it
7) finally getting settled into my place by unpacking boxes and cleaning out closets and making my mark on the place
8) an amazing group of friends that keep me grounded here
9) reconnecting with 3 old friends I thought were gone forever: one actually lives here now!
10) Finally finding my Christmas spirit again (it had been missing for about 10 years).
11) Discovering that I actually LIKE exercising kind of!
The Bad:
1) Friends losing jobs/​not being able to find what they love this year (it makes me count my blessings, but still feel badly for them)
2) Adapting to a new normal in too many ways to count
3) Trying in earnest to get rid of at least the weight I gained during chemo, only to be thwarted again and again (while watching my mom effortlessly lose 20 pounds in half the time that I lost 7, on the same program, WITHOUT exercise)
4) Amazing GI distress and STILL not losing weight
5) Misjudging what I needed to contribute to HRA account to pay for medical bills by a long shot
6) Medical bills
7) Snoop Dog’s reality show
8) Colby B taking his grill back
9) a whole lot of growin’ up
Overall, 2007 was a marked improvement over 2006 and 2004 (which sucked worse than cancer). Traditionally even years are worse for me than odd years, so needless to say, I’m a little nervous about next year, but at the same time, looking forward to it with cautious eyes.

I’m giving you 1 star, 2007, which means, by my calculations, you owe me 6 stars. Because I fucking rock and you very much have not.
In most measurable ways, this has been the worst year ever. But I only have 31 of them to compare it to, so what the hell do I know?
If you haven’t been paying attention, and, based on the flufftard that keeps getting elected governor of this Great State, you clearly haven’t, I’ll recap some highlights:
1. In Mid-​March, the day after my birthday, I gave myself bursitis in my elbow by falling asleep at my desk at work with my head propped up on my arm. Yes, bursitis. A fucking old person’s disease. My bursa ended up rupturing and getting infected. Which prevented me from training for and riding in this year’s MS 150 (the highlight of many a year). Nine months later, it still hurts occasionally. And when it does, it hurts like a bitch. So, fuck you, 2007. From bursitis sufferers everywhere. I’d give you an elbow to the face, but I am down to one good one.
2. Health problems abounded for friends and family, too. A leukemia diagnosis, (that turns out to be aplastic anemia) a breast cancer scare, a friend’s unborn baby that appears to have no corpus callosum, a prostate cancer scare from my dad, eye surgery for my mom, a minor heart attack while driving for a friend. Sadly, this is just off the top of my head and just from the last 4 months or so. I am sure I am leaving some off, and I don’t mean it as an insult to anyone if I am … Like a friend’s surgery that I just remembered.
3. A special shout out needs to go to my mom’s fallen bladder. Now, I don’t know what a fallen bladder is exactly, but I have found 2 things about it: It will keep your mom from decorating for Christmas and it will cause your mom to use the word «vagina» three times in a conversation about it. Not just any random vagina (a subject that doesn’t make me squirm), but my mom is talking to me about her vagina. And the living room is not aglow with Christmas lights. These are not good things.
4. You might have heard. I’m unemployed. If you haven’t heard, you haven’t been around since August. Yeah, it’s December. Believe me. I know how long that is. I know how many freaking seconds that is.
5. I put together exactly 6 pieces of furniture from Ikea this year. Never a good barometer of the year. Do allen wrenches grow on trees in Sweden?
6. I actually got to send the following text message this year: «Dude. Is that an engagement ring on my ex-wife’s finger?» It was.
7. Two breakups in a year. New league record.
8. My beloved Indians go up 3 – 1 in the ALCS. They proceed to lose three in a row. Gut wrenching.
9. The Horns are shitty again. Mack Brown, you are dead to me. You and your cronies are stealing fat paychecks from my alma mater and I can’t wait for that to end. Try keeping a kid out of jail, Clap-​Man. I’d hope the Sun Devils pound your «strategy» back to the stone age, but if cavemen were this dumb, we wouldn’t be here.
10. I’ve seen more than a few movies about Vietnam. The GSD&M layoffs remind me of the Vietnam war. Watching my buddies die face down in the muck so that this fucking strumpet… Well, there isn’t a literal connection, Dude. But it still tore my heart out and did nothing to help my job search. Now, you can’t swing a dead cat in this town without hitting an out of work ad guy.
11. My dog likes my girlfriend more than he does me.
High points? I still have great friends — somehow. I’m in the best shape of my life. Ran about 150 miles this year. Finished the LIVEStrong Challenge. Met the new girl. Was presented a 2007 Kick Ass Award. My dog didn’t run away. I actually got my breath taken away, for the first time ever.
Each of the past 12 years I have lived here, I’ve stood under the giant Christmas Tree at Zilker Park and spun and spun and spun and thought about the past year and been happy. Always happy. Sometimes, moved to tears. I didn’t do that this year. I hate you that much, 2007.
I’m trading you in for a newer model. Something in a shade that doesn’t want to kill me.

My 2007:
Friends introduce me to Unilocal,which is at it’s very best a great tool for communities and businesses and a great (unintentional) social networking site. At its worst Unilocal is like The Real World where you «find out what happens when people stop being polite and start being real.» Except we don’t have to live together. or something.
I turn 30 and get glasses which leads to me feeling like a fat old lady who can’t see street signs… or like a voluptuous woman who knows what she wants and looks hot in her new librarian glasses. The way I view it really depends more on the state of my hormones than anything else.
I get fired from a great job (that I love) in a rather unexpected manner. Cut to Tara lying on her couch for three weeks with her ego in ruins. Pull it together and get a new job for a man who keeps telling me how he didn’t expect me to be «this sharp.» Apparently I interview like a special needs kid.
I didn’t get laid as much as I wanted in 2007, but then again, I respected myself a whole lot more. Funny how those seem to go hand in hand, innnit?
My sister gets accepted to not one but two colleges back home in California! Woohoo for sister!
My car, which is only four years old decides (without my permission) to crap out on me. To which I say, «To to dealership, with thee!» The dealership says, «Surely ye jest! For thou warranty has been up for many a mile!» To which I say, «F*ck Volkswagen,» and plan to trade it in. Very grown up response, me thinks.
I meet some new people that I instantly love being around. Matt. Larry. Christine. Rebecca.
I get the opportunity to get to know (better) some people I’ve «known of.» Colby. Jessica. Ernie. Matt.
All in all, I’ve been lucky and blessed and I hope y’all have a great 2008!
POP! Culture 2007:
The corpse formerly known as Don Imus took to the airwaves again, but it’s okay, his new partner is an African American female. For those keeping score at home, African American is slang for «nap…» well you get the idea. I certainly hope they are paying her enough to deal with that tired old bag of hot air.
Paris Hilton found God… apparently he hangs out at a Los Angeles County Jail.
Britney Spears went all kinds of crazy, child. She shaved her head, showed the whole world her goodies (a couple of times), went to rehab, left rehab, went to rehab again and then she lost her babies to the man y’all know wouldn’t win any «Father of The Year» awards. Pobrecita.
Dumbledore is gay! When asked for a comment, Project Runway’s Christian said, «Of course he’s gay! His robes are FIERCE!»
Anna Nicole Smith died of an drug overdose and the «news» world grinds to a halt while they broadcast twenty-​four hour coverage of her passing. Meanwhile, some dude named Kurt Vonnegut died.
Politics 2007
Hey! Watch that wide stance, Mister! Senator Larry Craig denies, then excuses, then denies again his solicitation of an undercover officer for sex in an airport bathroom.
Boom…Boom. Do, do, do, do, dooooo, doooo. «I’m not a Presidential candidate, I just play one on T.V.» Presidential hopeful Fred Thompson waits nine months to declare his intention for a Presidential run and then sets the tone for his entire campaign by announcing it on Jay Leno. Jay Leno = Bad ratings and not all that entertaining. Pretty much sums up his campaign.